naivety

(it's here! the emo one! and it's gona be corny ...wtf wtf. yala yala, i'm seriously kind of depressed recently.)

One day left for I being in MMU Malacca... if I managed to pass all the subjects wtf it's only my foundation year.

One minute you happily and nervously walk to the campus for the very first class, for the fear and fun of knowing strangers around you and the all new environment and stuff.
The next minute, you walk your last step off from the main gate.
You stop, looking back at the campus. " I'm gona miss much of every single thing here. "
You smile, and walk away moving on with your life with an utmost satisfaction...and sadness.

I am sure these are what many final year students feel. Many of them just had their last paper today. I was at the library, sleep-flipping through my notes of tomorrow's last exam. I saw them came out from the halls with joy. They have been taking pictures here and there around the campus for these two weeks.

* The two weeks when you have to wait by the library's door and barge in to get a table for yourself and your friends.

* The two weeks when you'll be spending your days at the campus (at the library, especially) and you call it your second home.

A good senior friend of mine, Kaydrin , is leaving too. 22 y.o., a guy with good studies and personality, and he's going to work with Microsoft at KLCC by this July. ( damn~!) Sorry ladies, he's taken. :P

Being the experience one in things despite his age, I have him filled with questions. He replies patiently and reasonably, and teach you things we need to have concern in life. Some juniors even call him 'si fu' a.k.a Master. :D

We met at the library as I was preparing to leave. He just had his final paper too. Then he said, " wait! pictures! pictures! " Kayd puji-ed my camwhoring skills wtf. -_- I'll ask the pics from him a.s.ap. 'cuz want to see how good my skill is! :P

He then bade, "See you in KL, you party animal!" wtf-i'm-not, and rushed for the picture-session-appointment with his friends.

Seeing him rushing away, I told a friend (one of the juniors who call him Master) next to me that it'll just be a matter time by the next time we see Kaydrin. She said, " haiya, you in cyberjaya mah~ can meet up easier. Me in Malacca, T___T ". :P

I shook her hand and hugged her, " it was really nice to know you, MissFunny. "

wtf, crap-ed so long about this fella.

There were joy, laughs, cries, handshakes, snaps and lots lots lots of hugs.

I feel the warmth. Yes, part of me is blended with this so-called old-fashioned thoughts. I appreciate all these and I don't care what you think, and I can smile to myself afterwards. hmph~!

Be it a person, a pet, an ant on your filthy table, a cup/plate/bowl, a plane, a rabbit-like cloud, a fav' shirt in the closet, an arguement, a movie......

I understand that in everything you meet as long as you live, separation is always there. It will come to you one day in future, the next second, tomorrow and even the past. ( --> hard to explain this :P )

Time happens to be the judge, 'voluntarily'.

The moment of getting separated, that's the thing that makes me weak.

I feel pain, grievance, wasted, helpless and other-negatives-wtf-I-forgot-those-words-of-pathetic-feelings. Eventhough there's none any of my business in some cases, I feel them.

When others having jubilant joy, I'm happy and cheer for them. And vice-versa. Such a kepoh I am. :P

It's just too too too bad that I do not own a digital camera. Some say you don't necessarily need a camera to capture the moment thingy you want, memories in the head will be the best. Unfortunately, I'm on my way to the expert level of short&long-term-memory loss wtf.

Well, I did go around the campus and took some pictures at the end of my orientation week last June. >>>>> I ter-deleted them wtf. Ok la, settle! I'm gonna take my poor sonyK600i and go around like a travelling moron. I know I'm jakun wtf.

No one would actually believe that I'm this naive. And despite taking Mandarin for SPM and being a pure cina-pek wtf, 97.2746219% of the people think I'm a 'BANANA' ! (banana : a term used by many malaysians refering to Chinese who doesn't know Chinese) wtf. I AM NOT A PISANG ! T___T

At the end of the day, as what I've been doing, I wish and hope everything the best in future to people who're not evil, cruel, bad, brutally insane.

Naive, huh.